Movie Appraisal: Dagon (2001)

H. P. Lovecraft stories have had quite a few problems over the years. They are known for having racial overtones, strange gods, emotionless writing, and are carefully crafted cosmic horror stories. There are good things and bad things to every single one of H. P. Lovecraft's stories or novellas and the pros and cons come out the best in "The Shadow Over Innsmouth". You may be asking why I'm talking about that story and not "Dagon". I am because this film is actually based upon "The Shadow Over Innsmouth" instead of "Dagon".

"The Shadow Over Innsmouth" is one of H. P. Lovecraft's best known and most terrifying novels, mixing the unknown with genuine fear and adrenaline pumping horror. It involves the fleeing sort of horror, running from destiny, from death, and from an awful town full of strange folk. The racially charged overtones can be seen everywhere in it, as well as the ideas of strange religions and folk unlike ourselves.

I personally like Lovecraft and the types of stories he wrote. They come off as genuine even if the writing is not perfect or crazy emotional like most horror is today. He wrote the strange as if they were normal. Insanity was simply a side-effect of seeing something incomprehensible and suicide an easy out for the insane. The gods were deadly, evil things, and there was a rhythm to the stories and the plots. The characters were cookie-cut out of the same mold, but the situations were wholly new and beautifully done.

That being said, Dagon is... in a word... a mess. I'm not certain it knows what it wants to be or even should be. It'snot a horror movie, not really, although it has enough gore to suffice on that mark. But the out of place comedy does not work for horror or... well... really anything. I have found again and again that Lovecraftian stories, except by John Carpenter, tend to be overdone or cheesy, hardly worth the time or effort. This movie is no different. It feels hammy in all the wrong ways, but seems to want to be taken seriously, which I simply cannot do. The gore tells me that this movie does take itself seriously. The make-up effects are good for this kind of movie, and without the dialogue, characters, or sounds, this movie could have been wonderful, but ham and cheese acting, characters without any obvious motivations, and a plot that seems to convoluted to be fun to watch, this movie is an all around mess.

I can't say that I hate this movie. I just can't say that. I'm fond enough of Lovecraft and the story that I don't hate it, but I won't ever watch it again. I can't recommend it because it really is just that bad. Some scenes are better than others, but none are really all that good. None of the actors, except possibly the Spanish actors, are really good enough to pull this one off, and it comes as a disappointment. It could have been better, but ended up very hard to watch, with set-pieces instead of actual plot, and no characters to relate to.

Avoid this one. the stories are better and much more worth your time. Hell, even the video game Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth is better and should be played over watching this.

This brings me to my last point: Why are Lovecraft films so unfilmable? I don't get it. They should be easy to make, but no... they are all universally terrible. It saddens me. I guess I'll stick with John Carpenter for my Lovecraftian fix. Into the Mouth of Madness and The Thing are genuinely amazing movies. Watch those instead of this ambitious failure.

Cthulhu

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

"In his house in R'lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming." -And with that line, a legend was born. H. P. Lovecraft was a genius when it came to thinking of great things lying in wait. Cthulhu is probably one of the best known eldritch horrors known now. He is some kind of god, something to be worshiped by the people of Earth. I know I'm not all correct here. I am not in fact an expert on Lovecraftian gods, but it has always seemed to me that Lovecraft himself didn't like to categorize things such as this, relying instead upon the fear generated by these indescribable entities rather than some simple categorization to keep them straight. Lovecraft was a lot of things, and, it seems to me like he was all about the horror and much less about the whole, let's put these things in nice little packages and put definite names and personalities on them. No, Lovecraft was perfectly happy to inspire dread rather than pure academic interest, and that is the success of his writing.


Cthulhu is incredibly well known today, being both used as a cultural meme and as a sign of some unknown and elder thing that resides, fearfully, in a place that we as humans cannot find him. He is a mysterious figure, and one that cannot be explained. He was thought of by a man, given life by a story, and he resides in culture as something that could almost be the truth. He is not worshiped as far as I know (mostly because he is quite fictional) but there are entire websites and societies dedicated to him. There are countless homages giving praise to this god of fiction. Songs have been written about him, authors have used his likeness in works by themselves. Stephen King pays homage to Cthulhu in his seventh Dark Tower novel as Roland and Susannah rush through the bottom of a broken castle pursued by something that had come through Todash space (the space between worlds). Neil Gaiman has used the character in his story "I, Cthulhu". Even the video game Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corner of the Earth is a reference to this incredible entity.


He has survived for nearly a century as something old and fantastic. And the whole idea of Cthulhu speaks strongly of our cultural identity of wanting something more from life and something interesting. We have religions and holy books and Gods (monotheistic and polytheistic varieties), but none seem to have the fictional hold that Cthulhu does. He doesn't even appear in that many of Lovecraft's works, but that doesn't matter. It's the interest that holds us captive. We want to believe in something that isn't quite an evil God, but rather something that only cares about worship, only cares about consuming, only cares about its own power. It is a twisted version of our own God(s), the Creator(s) of existence, the Force that surrounds us. Cthulhu is a negative force, one bent in destruction and based in darkness. And there is something primal and wrong about that, but also something that feels like it is incredibly right. It makes sense. And we want it to exist because it lends some mystery to the world, something that is rarely present anymore.


Maybe I'm reading too much into the whole thing. Maybe it's simply that Cthulhu has a nice name and was in some good stories, but I have to believe that it's more than that. It hits something in us and makes us nervous in turn, allowing us to wonder if something with that face of an octopus, something wholly, or nearly wholly, alien, could have created us, could have brought us to worship it, and could make us destroy ourselves. It's a fascinating thing to think about, and one that requires a good amount of thought to bring the right theories across.

Book Evaluation: De Vermis Mysteriis (????) by Ludwig Prinn

I found this book at my local book-sale last winter. It was an old tome, completely in Latin, or so I thought. before I had bought it, I flipped through it quickly, noticing words and phrases that I could identify with my own knowledge of Latin. The book itself is also in German as well, and there is some English, but it is incredibly hard to read, varying from full sentences written in incredibly broken English to sentences that have no relation to the English language at all except that they use English words.

While going through this book, reading and translating, I would often find myself with unbearable headaches that would last for hours at a time. Sometimes I would black out and have incredibly vivid nightmares of necromancy and forbidden magic. It appealed to me in some horrific way. The forbidden knowledge and arcane arts seemed to call to me from beyond some vast distance, across both time and space.

Soon, I had read the whole thing, or so I thought, but the next day, while hoping to look at a certain part again, I found new words and verses written on different pages. Notes and scribbles were now written in the margins, nonsense phrases full of maddening riddles that keep digging into my very mind as the world seems to crumble down around me.

The magic is the most important thing now. I must have Ludwig's greatest memory carry on. The dimensional horrors must be shown a way in. The Great Gods must be released upon society to bring enlightenment and fiery Hell upon all who deserve it. There are paths the words tell me to take.

The sentences make more sense now. They scream at me to let the Old Ones in. They scream at me and I have no way... no way to end that powerful shock to my mind. I hear it and I express regret. It has been too long. I have read too much. The Old Gods will come, and soon... soon... existence will come to an end.

How much longer can I wait?

The drums... I can hear them all whispering to me now... They speak of the eternity I will face... the eternity I will find if I do not allow them out. Why did I have to read that book? Why did I have to let it call out to me. forbidden knowledge should have remained that way... but now the sorcery runs rampant and I alone can start or stop them... Please, I need to know what... The Mysteries of the Worm. The worm... The great worn who awaits us all.

Tired now. Weak. taxing. It taxes me and I cannot...

I only want it away. Begone and it won't.

This book is disturbing and all I want... all I need... is to have never read it... but I have... I have and that's...

Video Game Assessment: Fallout 3 (2008)

Fallout 3. I hadn't actually planned on reviewing this game since it isn't exactly a horror game... but I think it has enough horrific elements to it to be put in my October Nights series of reviews. One of the main reasons I'm reviewing this game is because I'm playing Fallout: New Vegas at the moment and it's reminding me of this game and how creepy some parts of it were.

I'm going to try to focus on certain aspects of this game, mostly horror aspects... which is not a hard thing to concentrate on. An alternate America has experienced a nuclear apocalypse and it's pretty much a sucky place to live. This game starts out in Washington D. C. and the wastelands surrounding it. It goes on to show the terrible creatures and people constantly trying to survive in an environment not suited for it.

I could tell you how much I enjoyed this game, although I think most people who played it enjoyed it, but I think that's not really the point of my review. Sure, I liked most of it (The visuals,the weapons, the gameplay... etc.), and there are parts of it I could complain mightily about (like the absolute lack of good characters and story), but I think this review will concentrate on the horror aspects of the game.

Most of the game is a horror story. The mutants, the wasteland, the creepy people... it all stinks of a horror story after the apocalypse. It feels that way and that's how it comes off. The shallow characters really allow one to focus on the situations and the roleplaying elements really come out since the player-character has no real personality, and the person playing tends to almost become the character... kind of creepy actually... well, it makes a good juxtaposition anyway. You can get lost in this game... simply lost for hours and hours... fearing as the character would fear, running as the character would run.

The monstrosities of the wastelands are only the beginning. There are ruins all around ripe for exploration and a quick death if the player isn't careful. The subway tunnels are of particular note because of how well they're done... and how dangerous they can be. When enemies in those subway tunnels are called ghouls... you know you're in for some crazy horror times.

As a casual mention, the DLC (downloadable content) Point Lookout is of particular note, being a DLC made completely with a horror story in mind. There is a strong psychological aspect to the horror here, and it's simply awesome. Also the Dunwich Building is probably the creepiest part of the game... and it should be... using the Dunwich name like that.

There are other aspects of this game that are terrifying as well... like the freaking Death Claw enemies that... *shudder*... you really never want to run into without a dart gun and some high explosives. Those things are terrible and awful and I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Anyway, the game is really awesome, and I like it a lot. It's one of those video games you can just get lost in, and that's always awesome. The characters are... well, they suck for the most part, and the story is as weak as anything... but the free-roaming environment, the gameplay, and the immersion really make this a game to pick up.

Movie Appraisal: Cast a Deadly Spell (1991)

For the second day in a row I was primed and ready to review Jacob's Ladder, which just so happens to be my favorite horror film of all time. I was about to go and watch it again and write a review when suddenly I have this crazy desire to watch this movie, Cast a Deadly Spell. If you've never heard of it before, I don't blame you. I hadn't heard of it before a few months ago for the first time.

The premise is interesting. It's pretty much a 1940's detective story with magic. Yeah, it's a weird combination, I'll say that much.  It's more detective story than anything else though. I find it hard to call it a horror story too. Until the end the horror end of the movie is played down pretty hard.

So, the story opens up in Los Angeles in 1948. "Everybody used magic." the opening title tells me. Is something wrong with the grammar there or what? I know what it's trying to say, but I don't think it's saying it right. Wouldn't it be "Everybody uses magic." or "Magic is a tool for everyday use." or something like that? The past tense really confused me there.

Then the movie gets going. We meet a detective named Howard Philips Lovecraft, but usually goes by Phil. Really, movie? That's what you're going with here? You're going to use the name of an author who was a known racist and misanthrope? Okay then. All right. Let's see where this goes then. Oh, and just to put this out here too, Phil's former chief detective (or something like that) has the name of Bradbury. I wonder if his first name is Ray.

Anyway the story starts off with a dame like every one of these detective stories starts out (or so the opening monologue tells us). I don't really see the dame in this case... but all right... No, seriously, where's the dame? The only dame I see in the beginning is Phil's landlady... and she isn't causing any trouble... and it can't be the girl who Phil meets later because she doesn't start any trouble... nor does the "love interest" introduced later on. So, Phil's voice-over monologue is a freaking liar.

Phil goes about his private detecting ways and early on we are forced to see that he doesn't use magic like everybody else. Okay... so this comes into play in the story eventually, right? We learn why he doesn't use magic and that lack of using magic like everybody else saves him in the end, right? Right? No, I'm sorry to say that none of that ever comes into play in this movie at all, and that's disappointing. It feels like there were a lot of good ideas but none of them were used well at all. The only thing that Phil not using magic is meant to show is his integrity, but it's a silly notion. Magic must be a relatively new thing in this universe, but using it would help him solve crimes and put those bad guys away for good... plus, he wouldn't get into half of the terrible situations he does get in to. Use your head, Phil.

Anyway, Phil soon meets up with a man named Amos Hackshaw, who's played by David Warner. I've never heard of the name David Warner before, but the actor is so familiar I want to yell at the screen who he is even though I can't really remember. Anyway, this guy is very obviously not a good guy. I can tell this right off. He seems a little odd and well... anybody who wants the Necronomicon can't be a good guy... plus,  the actor always played bad guys from what I can remember, and since I can't remember anything, I'm going to go with my gut on this one.

There are some weird other scenes earlier on... most of which are just strange. There's a little guy named Tugwell, who is my favorite character by far, who goes and does murder. He seems to be a genuinely terrifying guy who only stands about four feet tall. I like this guy. I like his spirit. I want him to be the hero. (He isn't the hero. He's just a lackey for one of the villains.)

Anyway, the story goes on and I keep having flashbacks of The Big Sleep and The Maltese Falcon. This detective story seems to have a ton of elements of those two movies... and you know what? This movie is worse than any of them... it's probably worse than most 1940's era detective movies. I kind of wish this movie were in black-and-white. It feels like it should be. There's not reason why it isn't and it makes me confused. For a movie that so obviously wants to be a throwback to better detective movies, this movie isn't trying very hard.

And I talk about the detective elements instead of the horror ones, because the horror ones are stupid. Throughout this film, little things seem out of place because of the "magic" world gimmick, which is all good and fine, but the horror elements are lacking. Every time a horror gimmick or creature is introduced this movie turns from a serious detective film to a slapstick horror comedy, like Evil Dead 2, and that just doesn't fit. It doesn't do the comedy as well as Evil Dead 2, and thus it's comedy is stupid and makes me want to punch the screen until something breaks. Thankfully the horror elements are used sparingly, but this is the main gimmick of the film. How can the main gimmick be used sparingly in a film that really needs the gimmick to stand out?

Well, I guess you're starting to get my impression of the film. It's not good. It's actually pretty terrible. The acting isn't bad (mostly), but that's about the only good thing I can say about this movie for the most part. The scenery is weirdly washed out and doesn't look real. Again it would all look better in black-and-white. The monsters are  really fake looking and used with so much stupid humor that the scenes they appear in just make you want to hold your head in your hands until it goes away.

The plot eventually makes itself a bit interesting when a virgin sacrifice is required to summon the Old Gods, including Cthulhu and Yog-Sothoth. The ending of this scene, which is the best scene in the film, can be scene from a mile away... with the sixteen year old girl not being a virgin any longer.

So, let me say what this movie has in it: statutory rape played for laughs, a gargoyle getting kicked in the gonads, an angry landlord taking a shotgun to some gremlins, a serious conversation between to old friends, a very small man being drowned in a bathtub full of bubbly water, a zombie breaking a broad's arm, zombies building houses, the last of the unicorn hunters, a serious detective story, Cthulhu rising from beneath the ground, eating a dude, and then going back down, the Necronomicon, a demon rising from a pot of soup, and a great scene with a layer named Thadeus Pilgrim.

Ugh... I don't know what else to say... oh, yeah... when was it established the sixteen year old girl virgin was the last of the unicorn hunters? When Phil drove past her for the first time he seemed to think it was all very normal. I guess it wasn't Phil, was it? Why didn't you say something at the time? What about all the other virgins out there? Why did she have to be the virgin of choice? Couldn't it have been a male virgin too? Or is that just not allowed? I never understood that in movies. Why is it always a female virgin? Is it because males seem to fantasize about female virgins and male virgins are usually icky people who shouldn't be spoken of? Is that it? It must be and it's silly and stupid and these stupid movie characters should really get these virgin sacrifices to make sense... and if this girls father really wanted her to be a virgin for life, maybe he should have made certain she didn't hit on everything with a penis that moved in her general direction. And statutory rape played for laughs? Really, movie? What is wrong with you? And by a police officer no less... I don't understand... This movie is just the opposite of classy... it's base and seriously...? Kidding around about a police officer having sex with a sixteen year old girl?

As you can tell I'm confused and angry. This movie is a million times worse than Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2, and that's a thing I've never thought I'd say (even though that movie was actually pretty good). I wish I'd have my ninety-six minutes back. I wish I had just reviewed Jacob's Ladder.

Short Story Scrutiny: "The Colour Out of Space" (1927) by H. P. Lovecraft

Okay, I don't have a picture for this one, which I'm infinitely sorry for. Honestly though I can't see this review having a picture anyway. "The Colour Out of Space" by Howard Philips Lovecraft is the single best examples I have ever seen of a purely atmospheric piece of horror. Sure, there are other good examples by other authors, but this one is the best because of how it effectively uses the material to be terrifying.

Now, personally, I am not a huge H. P. Lovecraft fan. I like some of his stuff some of the time, but most of his stuff is garbage and unfit for brain consumption. I mean, the man was about as racist as a man could be and it comes off in his writings as random asides about the inferiority of other races. Kind of sick in a way.

But in this story, the idea of racism doesn't raise its ugly head. Instead this story focuses on an alien, which also happens to be the title of the story. It is a colour from space that is the real horror. It steals energy from the land and the people on it eventually driving them all insane. They all die fairly horribly not long after that as the area itself becomes a haven for otherworldly wildlife. The most horrific part for me is how everything earth-like and natural for us turns gray and disintegrates into nothing at all. It provides a sharp contrast to films and other stories that have the horror being something substantial that one can fight. The horror of this story isn't in the substance, but rather the lack of substance, the lack of an enemy, the lack of motive. The fear here is really very little,but it is used so effectively that the horror becomes much more tangible than any mindless slasher film. There is a feeling of absolute dread that spreads its way across the story and in some ways it feels much realer than most other stories out there. In some ways it almost feels as if this story could happen in our world... or maybe already has.

What I'm saying is that this story is outstanding and its short length leads it to being accessible to just about anybody. Check it out and see the horror of "The Colour Out of Space" for yourself.